Monday 23 July 2012

Giant fiery ball of doom

Yes it has appeared in the sky again, it has been a rare occurrence this year but it is back, this means I go into a semi hibernation mode as to not lobsterfy when I put the washing out etc, it also means I shall have to worry less about slugs. What it does mean is flies, as my cats won't eat all of their food which means our conservatory goes black & starts to buzz, feeding them outside might be a better plan. I have however mowed the lawn & trimmed the hedges early this morning so I don't have to wait till the evening to do it & can get on with everyday household tasks here on in until about 5pm when I feel I can safely go out in the garden without having to dress like a ninja. Also it means I will get even more snuffly with hayfever.I don't hate the summer, its just that summer hates me.

Thursday 19 July 2012

50 Shades of Mummy Porn

Well how many women do you know who haven't either read it or are waiting to get it? I bet the amount is shrinking. It seems strange that what would normally pass away as a small footnote of erotica has now become a best seller. Are women becoming more desensitised to the slightly more unusual side of sexuality? Are they trying to spice things up a bit? Or trying to reinforce the idea of a bog standard sex life is actually what is needed? Or just a good bit of escapism? What ever the reason I have heard some rather interesting conversations about it & the topics it contained within, introducing people to things that they had no idea about. Is it freeing society, making people explore their sexuality more? Is it corrupting it, making people more voyeuristic? Which ever it is, it has made EL James a very wealthy woman, although what I have heard it wouldn't win much in the way of literary awards except maybe a Lemon Drizzle Dildo in the Mummy Porn Awards. I must admit I haven't read it but then again man on woman doesn't really hold that much appeal in that kind of sense. If you've read it & enjoyed it good for you, if you bought into the hype & then was sorely disappointed, you shouldn't set your standards so high for a mass marketed product. Ah the marketing that is truly the key to its success, got to love how companies can push things to people, anyone for Iceland chicken nuggets?

Friday 13 July 2012

Worst Make Up Ever

Yesterday, whilst on my lunch break from my retail job I went for a wander to walk off lunch a bit & whilst wandering down the one end of the shopping centre I spied a drag queen, ridiculous eyebrows, pale pink lipstick, orangey foundation the works, that was until I realised it was a woman who wasn't wearing her make up for comedy effect, it was tragic, funny & shocking in equal measure but it is not the first time I have noticed women wearing bad make up, OK no where near as bad as that, but I have seen some that have come close. Some of the women I have seen wearing the make up might have even looked pretty if they hadn't got on a layer of coloured ceramic crushed into lard on their faces. seriously the more make up you put on the more hideous most people look. Keep it simple, no guy wants to have that smear on his t shirt when when he hugs you, or too wait 5 hours to put a clown mask on or wait 3 hours for you to take it off again. I'm not sure what they are trying to achieve with their make up but it sure isn't beauty with the hideousness that I have seen. Be proud of what you look like, don't hide it. Oh & I have also found a direct correlation with women with that kind of make up with the Russell Brand hairstyle too which is more disturbing so not only do they look hideous now they will look even worse when their falls out because they have damaged it soooo much.

Monday 9 July 2012

British Sporting Acheivements

Wow I managed to to watch some sport this year, OK it was tennis & being as though I was ill did sleep through a fair amount of it but it was good to see a British player at a final of well anything, well done Andy, you may not have won but you did lose to the best tennis player in world history & you did win a set against him & lets face it we haven't had a British player in the men's final at Wimbledon since Fred Perry. England still hold The Ashes (surprisingly), England was ranked number 1 in Rugby in 2004, but we do tend to fair badly in football & the Winter Olympics, so what does this tell us about about our sporting achievements, that we have it in us as a nation? Must try harder as a nation? That in some sports we hit above target? If you talk to anyone about Britain/England & they will give you different answers, some say we are nation who prides our self at being crap at any sport, I think that is a little unfair, if we good at every sport & we won everything it would make watching it boring, the fact that everyone with exceptions has a relatively equal chance of success at sport makes it interesting. Sport doesn't particularly interest me too much, I like it when Britain/England do well but don't get to over excited by the prospect of us in sporting or to be honest most other competitions, I think we should pride ourselves & doing OK & wish all of our Olympic hopefuls well but not to put too much pressure on them. Though we could of let them train on our own facilities like all the host nations do.

Thursday 5 July 2012

The Higgs Boson & Creation

Bad luck Prof Stephen Hawking you are $100 out of pocket, but well done to those at CERN for finding what they set out too. Though it does pose the question what next? Create a mini universe by seeing how it reacts with other particles? OK that is simplifying way too much but the possibilities are endless in understanding how the universe was created rather than saying God did it. Although I am a man of faith I do not ignore science, as those who do often end up looking stupid & end up with the answer of 'because it is & that is how god made it' which is not a an answer in the slightest as there is no evidence to back it up & to say you don't need evidence is close minded & arrogant. Always question things even if it does take you out of your comfort zone. Stories of creation were told in their ways as people just didn't know & were trying to make sense of it all with little knowledge or equipment to work it out. Though scientist may have gone some way to understand how the universe happened it doesn't answer the why, that is when you if you so wish add in your deity, but do at least put some effort into explaining why if you are going to speak publicly about it, rather that 'it just is'. We know the world was not created in 7 days by a beardy bloke on a throne in the sky, it wasn't some cosmic lotus or ash tree either, these are analogies & treat them as such. What the people at CERN did was amazing & does not detract from the magic/miracle of the universe & just by trying to explain how it happens can only add to the beauty & awe of it. On another plus side we didn't get sucked into a black hole like the media said we would.

Tuesday 3 July 2012

Not being a morning person

This post is being written as I am still half asleep & will not be able to write something sensible on politics, U turns, cuts etc, even though that is generally what I listen to when I wake up of a morning. It will sink in by about the middle of the day when I have properly woken up. I find it difficult to get out of bed, so warm & cosy & sleepy. It isn't until I have eaten breakfast done my exercises & had a shower that I feel human & isn't until after lunch do I even feel remotely intelligent. I tend to sleep soundly & deeply unless I hear a strange noise & generally sleep between 6-8 hours so it isn't a lack of sleep. Perhaps its because I have a deep loathing of coffee, the taste & smell of it & can never be bothered to make myself a cup of tea. Maybe its because I'm a lazy trout or perhaps I'm just not wired that way, either way I don't feel fully awake will talk more when my eyes stop threatening to shut& my doesn't want to use the keyboard as a pillow.